My cousin sent me this a few minutes ago and it was so cleverly written I thought I would share it. I think I spend SO much time on my computer that I have a hard time functioning in real life. Quite often when I have misplaced something in the house, my first inclination is to do a "search". Unfortunately, that doesn't work. I also look for an "undo" button quite often.
Is there anyone else out there that feels the same way???
Happy Valentines!
INSTALLING A
HUSBAND
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the
flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under
Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs,
such
as
Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed
undesirable
programs such as
NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes
the
system.
Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these
problems,
but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate
DEAR DESPERATE,
First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download
Tears
6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that
application
works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically
run the
applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband
1.0
to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6...1.
Please note
that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download
the Farting and
Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law
1.0
(it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize
control of all
your system resources..)
In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0
program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband
1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider
buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We
recommend:
Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.
Good Luck !
Tech Support
I have no idea who wrote this or I would give them credit.